Being German, Damian like cold, dark and scary graveyards and so one night, he decided to take a walk in a cold, dark and scary graveyard.
He was walking along, perfectly content with his own company when suddenly a white rabbit in a green waist coat bounded past him and down a rabbit hole. “Well oh well” said Damian, in his stereotypically German accent. “I must follow that rabbit, after all I have nothing better to do than start scrambling down rabbit holes.”
He bounded too the hole and jumped in. Quite luckily, the hole was a substantial one for Damian was a substantial man. He reached the bottom in no time.
Now you all know the story of Alice and Wonderland and so you all know that when Damian reached the bottom, he was confronted with a tiny little door, a table and an array of foodstuffs that make you bigger or smaller. Damian however, had not read Alice and Wonderland and so he put himself through the tiring business of going smaller and then going bigger again to get a key and then smaller once again. It’s the same routine we’ve all had to sit through when it’s been on TV.
Anyway, soon Damian was through the tiny little door and he found himself in a wonderful land! It was Wonderland! Then he had a heart attack and died.